On Jan 1st, 2008 nicole murray wrote:

My husband was recently transfered to the south Kortrigt facility, our marriage has been ending due to his addiction and my turning my back on the fact he truely needed help. I want to let everyone know I am here and willing to help in anyway possible. We love him and want him to succeed.

On Jan 7th, 2008 GKJ wrote:

In the story of the Excorsist, an otherwise sweet child was posessed by a demon. That is the story of addiction.
We employ rational and reasonable acts of "help" to our afflicted loved ones, but they are incapable of any expected reasonable responce because they are essentially posessed by a cunning and manipulative drug that replaces who they otherwise are without the drug.
It is very important for family members to educate themselves about the bio chemistry that is occuring in their loved one to understand the true nature of how "posessed" by the disease their loved one is. This will allow them to take issues such as blame, shame,anger and misguided cause off the table and focus on actions that will help.
Once understood family members are better suited to recognise, react, and speak to the disease while also promoting and supporting the spirit of the person they love.
It is very important for family to separate the demon from the person, and know the difference. Ultimatly, that is the difficult battle that the afflicted loved one faces within themselves and as much as we may see ourselves as victims, they are the ultimate victims of this cruel disease.

On Jan 18th, 2008 Megan Bedford wrote:

I work at a residential rehab and we continually ask that the family stay involved with the recovery process. We know that it is very tough for the families and the addicts who are dealing with substance abuse issues. In my opinion, with out the help of the families, I do not think that we would be able to truly help substance abuser\'s get fully recovered. Every time we have an individual enter our program we immediately get in touch with the family and work with them as much as possible to provide the best care possible to the individual and give the family back that person they once lost.

On Jan 24th, 2008 LVA wrote:

GKJ's analogy of the demon-possessed child in the Exorcist is very accurate. It has helped me to put things in perspective as to how to look at a family member who is into substance abuse. But may I know how to educate ourselves on the bio chemistry occuring and how to speak to the disease. I am listening.

On Feb 3rd, 2008 Ivitth C Silva wrote:

we need to quit smoking weed

On Feb 12th, 2008 mpoe wrote:

If any one can help; me understand percoset abuse i would appriciate an email. myb life is falling apart because my spouse is addicted and i cant help him.

On Feb 12th, 2008 anastasia wrote:

Everyone, there is help in Christina Grof's books.

On Mar 16th, 2008 T. Bruner wrote:

I have a son who is 30 years old and has been abusing drugs and alcohol since he was 18. He has been in and out of jail and rehabs. I have tried everything I know. I just hate to sit by and watch my son die slowly everyday. He is losing weight again and never has any money. I know he using hard drugs. My hands seem to be tied. All I can do is pray for him everyday.

On Mar 25th, 2008 Diana wrote:

I read these comments over and over and over again. Blog after blog. Website after website. But is anyone helping us? My family has tried for the past two years to get my 22 year old herion-addicted son any kind of help. You name it, we've done it. So we sit and watch him waste away. You say I and my husband should understand all the chemistry-related material out there. We have. Do we have a good perspective about what has happened to our son? You bet we do. Are we crying anymore? No, we are numb. Will we always be there for him? Yes, until he takes his last breath.

On Mar 25th, 2008 diane wrote:

This is the first time i logged in this webpage. I am desperate. My 22 yr old daughter is tided up to the devil/drug addiction. She just became a mother in Octobr 2007. She has a healthy and beautiful baby girl. I dont know what to do. She has lapsed three times already since she gave birth. I dont know what to do. I think I have been living a lie, and I dont want to see what is right there in front of me. She was clean and sober for almost the entire pregnancy, however, has lapsed 3 times already. She has been in a 3 month program and since then never back to one. Are these lapses, a sign or proof that she will be back to the streets or what? Does she need to go back to a rehab center? If someone can email me back and give me advise I will appreciated.

On Mar 25th, 2008 Boggess wrote:

My 18 year old son has been having major mood swings for 5 years. I recently found out that he started using pot at the age of 12. He now will take anything he can get his hands on. He has been stealing money and hocking everything in his path. I have gone through the whole gammet of emotions, (guilt, anger,ect...) He has recently admitted to being hooked on crack. I am at a loss, I don't even know what it is. How can I help him, get him into rehab. He refuses to go. We are at our wits end. Do we just push him out . Sometimes I feel as if we are enableing him by keeping him in a vehicle, job, and home to live in. Help with info would be greatly appreciated. Thank You .

On Mar 27th, 2008 nadia wrote:

my husband and i been married for almost 8 years now,m and for the most part of it we have been happily married, due to the fact that he has not used any drugs; he began using cocaine and heroin since he was a tenager, as a result of his parents spliting up, he had never since gotten any help, any rehab, he has been in and out of juvis without ever getting proper treatment or support from his family, from his father mostly because he was unaware of these drugs the power that it has over someone and believed him anytime he told him that he will quit...when we got married he was well than for more than 2 years, and i thought that everything was fine , we have been married for almost 8 years now and for almost 4 years he had started to use on and off cocaine and heroin, mostly heroin, we had gotten him into an inhouse treatment center he had attended on and off AA meetings, however nothing was consistent; i love him very much and i never hesitate telling him that; i have been doing everything that i learned and everything that i can to help him get better, i know that deep down he wants to quit but this deases got a hold of him good; PLEASE HELP US! i have been by his side many sleeples nights, i chased him many times when he got out of the house in a rage, i would like to know how to help him how to understand exactly what he is going thru, i would like to attend some family group meetings that go thru the same thing i am, so that i can be a better help ... please i know i have taken too much out of your time, but i hav nowhere else to go and get help, my family has been great and we all have been praying for him, ther is not a day that goes by that i dont hold him or tell him how appreciated it he is and how dead we are without him in our lives.

On Mar 30th, 2008 TH wrote:

This is my first time logging into this website and asking for advice on how to cope with drug addicts in my life.

First, there is my brother who is a heroin addict/recovering addict. He is attempting to get clean again but it's not going so well. My father and I are both having a difficult time dealing with the possibility that cutting my brother off is the only way he will hit rock bottom and realize that he wants to make an honest effort to get clean.

Then, there is my boyfriend. We have been together for about six months now. About two months into our relationship he told be he was a recovering heroin addict. He had been clean for a few months at that point. He recently told me he has been using again for the past month. He just left town for the week to try and get back on track.

I couldn't walk away from my boyfriend when he first told me because he was really trying to stay clean. I couldn't walk away from him now because I care even more.

Both my brother and boyfriend are dealing with this horrible addiction and I feel absolutely helpless. I'm not sure how to be supportive anymore. I want to find a support group in order to gain a better understanding of what both of them are dealing with. Are there any meetings for family members dealing with drug addicts in the Baltimore area?

On Apr 15th, 2008 carole wrote:

it is just unbelievable how devastating drug addicition can be on the user and the impact it has on famiy and friends. My son is addicted to heroin and I cant count how any \'fresh starts\' he has had. Everytime those that care for hi try and help and maintain hope that this time it will be different. It is so very hard and torturous to watch the deterioration of your flesh and blood, to see a beautiful soul transformed into an unrecognisable monster. Our failies hearts go out to all those addicted and just as uch to their family and friends who have no choice but to endure and maintain hope against hope.

On Apr 19th, 2008 Dena Hale wrote:

AT 3:45 am I was awakened with a phone call from my brother whom I had not spoken to in over 10 years. He was crying he was dying and wanted me to come to him back east. Leave my job, tell no other family members, and be with him in his last 90 days. Our family is all bi-polar, he has never been treated. He has smoke marijuna all his life secretly. I was sad and scared at the same time. i did not hear from him again for days. I got a call yesterday, it was from a rehad center so I know he gettting some kind of treatment. I do not know what to do. How can I help him most? To take time off I will have to take FMLA so as not to loose my insurance and without pay. My brother says he is sending me money to take care of expenses and he really wants me to move back there to learn his business. He says he is dying not that he is addicted. If a person has used MJ since they were a teenager till age 51, how long does it take to kick the habbit? Can it kill them? He sounded like he was dying. I don't know if that is all he is using. I am about to feel I need to be committed myself since I can not talk to anyone and even little to him at this point. Any information.

On Apr 20th, 2008 Elkaye wrote:

My partner is addicted to alcohol and xanax. She has been in AA, rehab, and a psychiatric hospital. I no longer trust anything she says. I just want to know how people stay with their loved ones after going through disappointment after disappointment. At what point can you begin to trust again?

On Apr 28th, 2008 Cristi wrote:

Where do you draw the line?? I have spent every dime--including all the equity in my home to try to help my child (young adult) He has been to 3 very expensive rehab centers including a 5 month long term care facility. He has had out patient counseling and support. I have attended all the family sessions. At this time he has a good job ---but-- I see the cycle beginniing again it just keeps going over and over 5 steps forward 25 back I don\'t know how to try to help him and love him so much it hurts---I am so so weary and out of money and trying to recover from a serious illness myself---how do you find the wherewithall to keep trying??? Any suggestions.

On May 1st, 2008 Deb wrote:

I read all these blogs and I say to myself, wow, we aren\'t alone. My son is 26, we stayed clean for a year and 2 weeks, then for a reason I will never understand picked up again. It has been a month now and he is just can\'t stop. He is also bipolar and is on depression med\'s. I feel the same as another person by saying you just sit and watch them die a slow death. We have gone through all the rehab\'s, out patient, sponsor, meetings, etc. But it has such a hold on him. I just cry and sometimes just pray that if this is his life for ever that God would just take him now so that he does not have to endure all the pain. I would say \"help\" however, it seems that so far no one has an answer. Thanks for listening.

On May 2nd, 2008 karyn wrote:

to diana and deb, i'm in the same position. i know how you feel and i'm sorry. i'm thankful that i've still got so much sadness though, if i were indifferent, i'd be giving up hope. i wish my daughter didn't suffer so much, our family suffering is nothing compared to my childs'.

On May 3rd, 2008 Charlene wrote:

Our 30 year old son has been on drugs for over 18 yrs, in prison, re-hab and he does good for alittle while, then he starts going to a dr. for prescription meds. and they give him 100 pills for one month. He doesn't need this and won't tell the dr. he is an addict. I can't stand this anymore, he is such a good guy off drugs and I feel that if I don't answer that phone call or check on him, he'll die and I won't be able to live with myself. I know tuff love, then what suffer the consequenses?

On May 5th, 2008 Jo wrote:

My 30 year old daughter has been addicted since she was about 18. I denied it for a few years and then I couldn't anymore. She has two children who are now 12 and 13. She lost custody 1 year ago to her brother. Thank God for him and his wife who are raising them. She went to a 30 day rehab which worked for about 2 weeks. She is now in a sober living house and can stay for up to 2 years. The last time she went on a binge she got a DUI. I was furious. I have spent years trying to help her. I have bailed her out so many times and that was the worst thing I could have done. This last time I told her that I was done. I am tired. I also told her that I was going down to the funereal home and prepaying for her funeral because she was going to die. I aabsolutely refused to let her come to my house and her brother told her to never call him or her children again until she was clean. Her father and his wife and her other sister told her the same thing. She was and is out of options. As her mother it was the hardest thing that I have ever done. But I think that it is when she realized that she had hit bottom. I raised her alone and have always been the best mother and friend that I could be to her. She was absolutely devestated. We all have told her that if she doesn't get clean she has no where to go. Hopefully, tough love is going to work. I love her dearly but I refuse to participate in her death. She will have to die alone or she will have to get clean. Not much of a choice.

On May 6th, 2008 Christian wrote:

hey guys. My sister is a very rebelious child and my mom just recently kicked her out. My mom has been severley depressed about it. She also has fibromayalgia and degeneritive disk disease so she takes oxycodon for pain. She can never sleep so she takes amnitryptoline. She has mood problems so she takes effexor. And for depression she take Xanax. The effexor, oxycodon, and amnitryptoline have never bothered her. But now she is heavily addicted to xanex. Example: she just had a prescrption for 60 filled 5 days ago. They are each 2 mg and she is supposed to take them twice a day. Well now she is completley out. She has none left. When she took them, she was psychotic and couldn't remember anything and just was crazy. Now she is going through withdrawals and acts like she absolutley hates me and my dad! I'm only 15 and me and my step dad don't want her to go to rehab. But we fear she might get physically sick soon. Her doctor is a quack and prescribes whenever she wants them. We have made many complaints to his office. We don't know what to do and I'm so scared that something is gonna happen to her. Someone please email me with suggestions. Thank you. My email is cberry52792@yahoo.com

On May 6th, 2008 Patty wrote:

My husband has been a weed addict for a while now and I feel like I am going to explode. I feel like I am loosing him to this bad habbit. Everytime he is out I am waiting for his return to see if he is okay or high. I think that I am an addict to his habbit. Ever since I foung weed hidden in our car numerous of times I am always sneaking around his things making sure that there is nothing there. He says that weed is not a drug and that it's all natural stuff that can't harm you. I know better than to believe that! He can't seen to understand that it is a drug and that he is an addict to it. When you start to hide it's obvious to see that theren is a problem. Every time he tells me that he stopped, a couple of days/weeks later he proves me wrong, again. I don't know how to trust him. What hurts me the most is that the day of our wedding he smoked weed a couple of hours before. I married a man who told me that he had stopped smoking that stuff months before our wedding and I believed him. I feel like I am going crazy and sometimes feel like giving up and just leave him. I can't get him help if he doesn't see his habbit as a problem. He thinks that he can stop whenever he wants. What is he waiting for? He is breaking us up. Sometimes after long hours at work I don't feel like going home because I don't know how I will see him that day. I just don't know what to do anymore. Is there anyone that can help me in any way?

On May 9th, 2008 Debbie wrote:

I have a 30 year old daughter, who has been on drugs for about ten years, her drug use is very bad, she has been beat up by boyfriend and put in the hospital, she is now getting in trouble with the law. I have her children, we just found out her liver is bad. I am so scare I am going to lose a daughter. I have tried everything, there isnt anything I can do to help her until she wants to help herself! I pray for her everyday!

On May 25th, 2008 Patty wrote:

My older sister is now going through the same thing that I went through in my 30's. I'm watching her drink herself to death. Literally. She has high blood pressure and an enabling husband and I can only sit back and watch. She does not believe in AA nor does her husband. I feel so helpless.

On May 25th, 2008 stephanie wrote:

My brother has been on weeds and some heavy stuff for over 10 years although he said he quit the heavy ones.my mum and i tried and spent all we could to help and now he is living with me,and he brings weed home at home.. my husband and i talked to him about it since we have a small baby in the house, he said he understood and will not be doing drugs in our house.. yesterday though he had a party and invited some friends and i surprised one of them rolling a joint inside my house and they were smoking in the garden.. how to react to that, i'm past anger, sadness etc.. should i just ask him to go and get a place of his own.. he lies to us, he seems to be always high.. i have lost a lot to the aftermath of his addiction and i have a family now.. why is my brother so selfish? can anyone help

On May 27th, 2008 Laura wrote:

We just found out yesterday that our daughter in on heroine! In addition.... she stole money from her friends mother and broke into homes - all in one day we found this out. The questions asked.... why??????????? we never saw it. How did this happen.
The family is depressed, upset and shaken about this. I do not believe she hit rock bottom yet and I am scared of what may happen if she does not clean up. After reading all the other blogs I am eased to find there are others that are going through the same ordeal. God bless you all

On Jun 1st, 2008 KIM wrote:

Every pot addict doesn't progress to heroin, but just about every heroin addict starts with pot. Stephanie, google co dependency and enabling. Definitely kick your brother out. Living with the consequences of what he is doing may stop him from progressing further down the drug highway. It's called "TOUGH LOVE" and I wish I'd practiced it 2 years ago, but my husband is a constant enabler, justifying our sons use and making excuses..Love your brother enough to kick him out. Be strong!

On Jun 1st, 2008 KIM wrote:

My son has been addicted to Oxy for 2 years. He's gone through outpatient programs which helped for a few months, but he began using again. I believe residential treatment is the only way to help him, because Oxy is so readily available in our area, it's as easy to get as buying a soda, therefore, getting him away from his connections is critical.

For the lady with the heroin addicted son, if you still check in here.. there are Christian based residential treatment homes that are free or work with ou on payments. Teen Challenge (don't let the name fool you, it's mostly adults) it's one of the most effective programs around. Check with some of the churches that minister to addicts, also check with your local rescue mission etc. as they minister to alot of addicts/alcoholics etc.

On Jun 8th, 2008 HeHasMyHeart wrote:

I need advice, support or something. I am at the end of my rope with my boyfriend. I am 18 and he is 23...he is addicted to alcohol and drugs (xanax and klonapine). He has been addicted since his senior year of high school. When I met him a year ago he was drinking heavily daily and doing pills and smoking weed 5 to 6 times a month. Since we have gotten serious and began talking about living together he has cut way back. He now drinks once a week and does pills once a month. The alcohol he seems to be able to manage and doesnt have a problem with once a week drinking. (Although he frequently tells me he craves it daily) Pills...is a different story. He promises me every month that he won\\\'t take them again but that only lasts until it\\\'s time to get his rx refilled. I have threatened to leave him, screamed, cried, begged...I\\\'m just at a loss how to deal with this. When he is sober and clean he is the funniest, sweetest most loving man I have ever met. When he is using...he lies and becomes someone i don\\\'t know. He is NOT physically or emotionally abusive...he just lies about where he goes, what he does etc. When he comes off the pills he will eventually admit to the lies and after a few days he\\\'s back to his old self.

Right now our relationship is long distance. We live 3 hours apart. He says that when he can be with me forever that he won\\\'t take pills or drink ever again. I want to believe him and I think he intends for that to be true but I just do not see how being with me physically 24/7 will cure his addiction. He, not purposely, makes me feel guilty...as if I am to blame for him not being able to stop on his own. I am struggling with my own addiction (bulimia) and the stress triggers my addiction. It\\\'s a cycle that we\\\'ve been replaying for 6 months now. I am turning into the dreaded overbearing girlfriend that most people hate...including myself. It is nothing for our cell phone bills to log 100 hours a month with just our conversations. I just graduated from high school and he currently does not work...so we spend all of our time on the phone. He sleeps all day and stays up all night but I have to work part time so I can\\\'t stay up all night with him, even though I push myself to stay up with him to make sure he doesn\\\'t do anything. I know this is a terrible way to have a relationship but I do not know what else to do and I am not willing to let him go and give up on him. I love him with all of my heart but it\\\'s a constant stress wondering when he will use again or when the next time I call him if he doesn\\\'t answer where he went and what he\\\'s doing.

Today has been a very hard day. I talked to him at 3am before I went to bed and he was fine. He usually stays up til 5am or so and sleeps til 4 or 5 in the afternoon...so when he doesn\\\'t call me by 4:30 or 5 I go into panic mode. I called him several times and he finally answered groggy and unable to speak well. I knew at that moment he had taken pills. (I can always tell by just his first few sentences when he has been drinking/using) I kept nagging at him long enough until he, grumpily, woke up. All the while denying he had done pills. He tried to make some excuses about doing things for his parents etc but I cried and yelled until he said he wouldn\\\'t go anywhere. After a few minutes he decided to go to a local baseball game with his family and more than likely friends (all his friends are drug addicts...not exaggerating every single one of them.). He called me a few minutes ago from the game...heavily intoxicated. He admitted to taking Klonapine\\\'s and drinking.

As I sit here and type this I am terrified because he has to drive home. He is only 15 minutes from home but we all know that is long enough to get into a wreck and either kill himself or someone else. Wednesday he told me, after drinking Tuesday all night he drove to a fast food place and upon leaving backed into a parked car then drove away. I was livid of course. He begged me for forgiveness just now, worrying I would break up with him. I assured him I wouldn\\\'t but that I was beyond fed up with the pills and lying.

What do I do? I\\\'m so upset and scared and mad and a million other emotions right now. Any suggestions would be appriciated..I know from my own 12 step experience that advice giving is usually discouraged but maybe someones experience would help me.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Prayers to all those who are struggling,
HeHasMyHeart

On Jun 8th, 2008 HeHasMyHeart wrote:

I need advice, support or something. I am at the end of my rope with my boyfriend. I am 18 and he is 23...he is addicted to alcohol and drugs (xanax and klonapine). He has been addicted since his senior year of high school. When I met him a year ago he was drinking heavily daily and doing pills and smoking weed 5 to 6 times a month. Since we have gotten serious and began talking about living together he has cut way back. He now drinks once a week and does pills once a month. The alcohol he seems to be able to manage and doesnt have a problem with once a week drinking. (Although he frequently tells me he craves it daily) Pills...is a different story. He promises me every month that he won\\\'t take them again but that only lasts until it\\\'s time to get his rx refilled. I have threatened to leave him, screamed, cried, begged...I\\\'m just at a loss how to deal with this. When he is sober and clean he is the funniest, sweetest most loving man I have ever met. When he is using...he lies and becomes someone i don\\\'t know. He is NOT physically or emotionally abusive...he just lies about where he goes, what he does etc. When he comes off the pills he will eventually admit to the lies and after a few days he\\\'s back to his old self.

Right now our relationship is long distance. We live 3 hours apart. He says that when he can be with me forever that he won\\\'t take pills or drink ever again. I want to believe him and I think he intends for that to be true but I just do not see how being with me physically 24/7 will cure his addiction. He, not purposely, makes me feel guilty...as if I am to blame for him not being able to stop on his own. I am struggling with my own addiction (bulimia) and the stress triggers my addiction. It\\\'s a cycle that we\\\'ve been replaying for 6 months now. I am turning into the dreaded overbearing girlfriend that most people hate...including myself. It is nothing for our cell phone bills to log 100 hours a month with just our conversations. I just graduated from high school and he currently does not work...so we spend all of our time on the phone. He sleeps all day and stays up all night but I have to work part time so I can\\\'t stay up all night with him, even though I push myself to stay up with him to make sure he doesn\\\'t do anything. I know this is a terrible way to have a relationship but I do not know what else to do and I am not willing to let him go and give up on him. I love him with all of my heart but it\\\'s a constant stress wondering when he will use again or when the next time I call him if he doesn\\\'t answer where he went and what he\\\'s doing.

Today has been a very hard day. I talked to him at 3am before I went to bed and he was fine. He usually stays up til 5am or so and sleeps til 4 or 5 in the afternoon...so when he doesn\\\'t call me by 4:30 or 5 I go into panic mode. I called him several times and he finally answered groggy and unable to speak well. I knew at that moment he had taken pills. (I can always tell by just his first few sentences when he has been drinking/using) I kept nagging at him long enough until he, grumpily, woke up. All the while denying he had done pills. He tried to make some excuses about doing things for his parents etc but I cried and yelled until he said he wouldn\\\'t go anywhere. After a few minutes he decided to go to a local baseball game with his family and more than likely friends (all his friends are drug addicts...not exaggerating every single one of them.). He called me a few minutes ago from the game...heavily intoxicated. He admitted to taking Klonapine\\\'s and drinking.

As I sit here and type this I am terrified because he has to drive home. He is only 15 minutes from home but we all know that is long enough to get into a wreck and either kill himself or someone else. Wednesday he told me, after drinking Tuesday all night he drove to a fast food place and upon leaving backed into a parked car then drove away. I was livid of course. He begged me for forgiveness just now, worrying I would break up with him. I assured him I wouldn\\\'t but that I was beyond fed up with the pills and lying.

What do I do? I\\\'m so upset and scared and mad and a million other emotions right now. Any suggestions would be appriciated..I know from my own 12 step experience that advice giving is usually discouraged but maybe someones experience would help me.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Prayers to all those who are struggling,
HeHasMyHeart

On Jun 10th, 2008 Pam wrote:

I have a sad, happy story. I lost my son age 26 April 5th due to a infection he had gotten from interveinous drug use. Endocarditus. He was a 2yr Heroin addict, in treat 3 times using Suboxen. My 21yr old daughter, also a heroin addict got into Compdrug right after my son's passing. They are treating her with Methodone. This will be about a 2 yr program. Based on your INCOME. We are not weathly! SHe is 33 days clean! I'm telling you that there is HOPE. Starting with prayer! I created a my space for my son. I can give you additional information and support. This is MY mission. MySPace-Chadd Jordan. I hope to her from you and these families will be in prayers!

On Jun 18th, 2008 Laura Kay wrote:

I;m not sure what happen but, I ended up with a man who was addicted to any opiate. Crack, Coke, Pills, Booze, u name it he did it. I work all day and when he stop working, I beg hime to find a job and help with the expenses, then things got worse. I was unaware of the theft going on in my home. Money, video games even my digital camera lost to work of drugs. Then one day nerves struck and we went down threw there. A truck that he was currently hauling junk was in my name and was taken from me, my home was entered when i wasn't there and my checkbook stolen. Before, this day I suspected something but, to come to terms of this happening again just flooredboard me. Not even 9 months earlier, I had taken the time and went to a Drug Treatment Program that gave him Methadone. Boy was that the biggest mistake of our lives. Well, to the present, two months of (his names is Billy) hiding in the next town did I received a call on Saturday morning of the location of him and the truck. Nerves struck and because the police where not any help my father and I went to secure the truck and to have the police come and secure him. Once, he was arrested for the charges I had taken out, I get a call three days later from jail. It's him! He wants me to help him! Promises me any and everything! Right to the chapel since our wedding had been cancalled. Yep, fell for it again, I worked on this mom, she got him out of jail. Once, I laid eyes on him I could see the person I fell in love with again not the drug abuser he had become. The coldness in his eyes the day we fought and he took my truck was not there, instead a beaten man with no where to turn,and ask for my forgiveness! Now, what? My parents do not want me to have anything to do with him for fear of my life. I am 31 years old and a mother of two children and to be honest I believe Im addict to the man I fell in love with. I can't turn it off and hate! Someone help me! He's ask for my help and should I turn my back and say No for all he has put me threw?

On Jun 19th, 2008 Mrs. M wrote:

In response to Boggess\\\' comment on 3/25: I too have recently found out that my 20 year old son is using crack cocaine. I am devastated! I knew he smoked pot occasionally, but I wasn\\\'t very concerned about that since I have smoked that on occasions and never got hooked. I can tell you 2 good websites for information about crack are crackcocainerecovery.com and devilscandy.com. As for your concern about enabling him, I believe providing him with a car and job are only helping him to get his drugs. However, providing him with food and shelter are basic necessities. The problem with an addict with no job is valuables(anything that can be pawned), cash, your checks, etc. can become his funds to purchase crack. If he is living in your home, lock those things up or don\\\'t keep them at home! We have no power to force them into treatment since they are adults.

I do not want to turn my back on him, so I have chosen to encourage him to get treatment, offer my support, not to give him cash, gas, or anything valuable (even if he loses his job - since his job is only providing him with drug money), not to leave him unsupervised in my home, inform other family members of his addiction and warn about giving cash or access to their valuables, remind him of the people he has stolen from, let him know we will press charges if he steals from us, tell him if his addiction is the life he chooses to live, he must live it somewhere else (my worst nightmare! - but if he isn\\\'t willing to try to kick it, that is the best thing I can do for the rest of my family), and describe his potential future as an addict (homeless, hopeless, prison, death). I have let my son know that I love him and always will, I want to help him and support him if he is willing to seek help, but the choice is his (seek help or accept the hopeless future of an addict).

I would like to continue this conversation with boggess (3/25) or anyone else who is going through this.

Let\\\'s continue to pray for our loved ones souls and our own sanity! God bless all!!!

On Jul 1st, 2008 Aditi wrote:

Family therapy in substance abuse treatment can help by using the family's strengths and resources to find ways for the person who abuses alcohol or drugs to live without substances of abuse and to ameliorate the impact of chemical dependency on both the patient and the family. Family therapy,it can help families become aware of their own needs and aid in the goal of keeping substance abuse from moving from one generation to another.
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Aditi
Addiction Recovery Arizona
<a href="http://www.addictionrecovery.net/arizona">
Addiction Recovery Arizona</a>

On Jul 9th, 2008 Donna wrote:

I'm wondering where the "rule" and "guidelines" are for family members, i.e., parents when it comes to young adults recovering and they ask you for simple things, like a ride here (to a meeting or a doctor's appt) or to get together and have lunch weekly. My husband feels that I spend too much time with my daughter and that by doing too much for her, she is not learning to grow up. She has been doing well on the addiction part, I partly agree with him but not 100% -

On Jul 24th, 2008 alan wrote:

My boyfriend, soon to be fiance, is currently in the middle of a 12 step program for former meth users. He is on step four and went through an in house rehab program. We live far apart and are planning on being married next year in California. We see each other every month or so but it is hard being away. I call him every morning and night. This morning I called and he sounded depressed and sad. I am afraid that the depression will send him back to that dark place. Any suggestions?

On Jul 30th, 2008 Rebecca Schlosser wrote:

We are desperate - our 22 yr. old son in addicted to marijuana and is probably using harder drugs we do not know about. He is losing weight, wanting to avoid us, angry with us, always in a bad mood, very unorganized and cannot keep a job. We have tried everything: two interventions, three psychologists and three psychiatrists. We have not gone to "the bottom line" to ask him to leave. He is coming in at 5:00 in the morning, sleeping until 2:00pm, using my car and trashing it with junk, My husband and I are on sleeping pills to function. Please please please give us some advice.